Can I forgive others
“Forgive Again.”
By Camilla Alexander
God forgave me, but can I forgive others? More importantly, can I teach my children to do the same?
Many of us are familiar with the Parable of the Unforgiving Servant in Matthew 18. A king forgave his servant a debt of ten thousand talents, sparing him and his family from being sold to repay what he owed. Yet that same servant demanded payment from a fellow servant who owed him “an hundred pence,” and when the man could not pay, he had him thrown into prison (Matthew 18:23–35, KJV). Jesus used this parable to remind us that because we have received mercy, we are also called to extend mercy.
We know that Jesus Christ died for our sins and forgave us. Still, forgiveness can become much more difficult when the offense involves our children. When someone embarrasses, mistreats, or deeply hurts them, can we extend the same forgiveness Jesus requires of us—and teach our children to do the same?
As parents, it is natural and necessary to protect our children. However, protection does not require us to hold grudges, speak harshly, slander others, or pray for their downfall. Instead, we can teach our children how to guard their hearts after an offense while remaining aligned with God’s Word. Forgiveness does not mean pretending harm did not happen or refusing healthy boundaries. It means refusing to let bitterness control our hearts. We can help our children pray through their hurt, speak truth without seeking revenge, and place the person who offended them into God’s hands. In doing so, we teach them that forgiveness is not weakness; it is obedience to Christ.
Research on forgiveness education among children and adolescents suggests that learning to forgive can help reduce anger and support emotional well-being (Rapp et al., 2022). This is especially important as our children learn to process hurt, disappointment, and conflict.
Deuteronomy 6:6–7 reminds parents that God’s words are to be kept in our hearts and taught diligently to our children. That includes difficult moments. An offense can become an opportunity to teach our children what forgiveness looks like beyond a lesson they hear at church. They can see it lived out in our homes, conversations, prayers, and responses to people who have hurt us.
Ephesians 4:31–32 tells us to put away bitterness, wrath, anger, and evil speaking and to be “kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you” (KJV).
When we choose forgiveness, our children are watching. May our lives teach them that following Christ means choosing grace, obedience, and forgiveness even when it is difficult.
Information from:
UPCI – Ladies Prayer International Newsletter
